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1、你好啊Hi,there.这边是在干啥Whatsgoingonhere?小狗狗-这里有只小狗Puppy!-Apuppyishere!我们能养着吗我邻居的狗生了一堆Canwekeephim?-Myneighborsdoghadalitter.他们在找人领养Theyrelookingforpeopletoadopt.我爱他1lovehim.我希望他有狗狗的小鞋子Iwishhehadtinypuppyshoes.我绝对会免费给他擦小鞋Iwouldtotallyshinehislittleshoesforfree.我确实说的是最可爱的话Idosaythecuteststuff.听着我和正常人一样都喜欢狗
2、1.ook,Iloveagooddogasmuchasthenextguy,但这栋楼禁止动物进入butthisbuildingdoesntallowanimals.Andy把他带出去Andy,takehimoutside.啥然后杀了他吗What,andshoothim?不就把他扔出去No.Justkeephimoutside.哦别啊Ron我只是条小狗狗Oh,comeon,Ron.mjustalittlepuppy.我没做错任何事啊我只是条小狗狗Iaintdonenothingwrong.mjustapuppy.我喜欢你的胡子我希望我能长出来但我不行Ilikeyourmustache.Iwish
3、Icouldhaveone.But1cant因为我只是条小狗狗Becausemjustalittlepuppy.好的把他带出去杀了Okay,takehimoutandshoothim.公园与游憩公园与游憩公园与游憩第2季第22集第2季第22集着火了着火了着火了Fire!Fire!Fire!什么哪里What?Where?在我肚子里因为24小时Pawnee关心糖尿病电♥话♥募捐今晚开始-好谟Inmybelly.Becausethe24-hourPawneeCaresDiabetesTelethonstartstonight.-Goody.结果通知我们1.etusknow
4、howitwent.每年Pawnee关心组织和本地有线电视台Everyyear,PawneeCaresteamsupwiththelocalcableaccessstation会联合为糖尿病研究募捐toraisemoneyfordiabetesresearch.这很重要因为Pawnee是全美第四大肥胖的镇Andit,simportant,becausePawneeisthefourth-fattesttownintheU.S.前四是我们达拉斯塔尔萨和美国摩尔城的某些部分Itgoesus,Dallas,TulsaandcertainpartsofTheMailofAmerica.那么今年我能安排
5、我自己的四小时时段Well,thisyear,Igettoprogrammyownfour-hourblock.我知道很激动吧Iknow.Exciting!所以我给你们都分配了多个轮班So,Ihavesignedyouallupformultipleshifts.是的只要接听电♥话♥并提供精神支持就行Yes,justtoanswerphonesandprovidemoralsupport.从几点到几点Fromwhentowhen?今晚Tonight.早上2点到6点From2:00a.m.to6:00a.m.什么What?不LeSlie拜托No.Leslie,plea
6、se.今晚可是个很重要的晚上Tonightskindofabignight.你知道我的孩子们都走了然后.Youknow,allmykidsareaway,and.恶心不是Jerry的性♥爱♥之夜这会毁了性♥爱♥和今夜Gross!No!ItsJerryssexnight.Thatruinssexandtonight.先穿起这些T恤吧会让你们进入状态的1.ook,whydontyouputononeoftheset-shirts?Itllgetyouinthemood.我昨晚熬了整晚做完的Istayedupallnightlastnightm
7、akingthese.你在通宵节目的前一晚通宵了Youstayedupallnightthenightbeforeanall-nighttelethon.是的这就是原因看Yes.Andhere,swhy.Boom.”糖尿病共聚一堂携手并肩Diabetes.LetsDia-beat-this.是的四个小时想到这个口号♥Yeah.Fourhourstocomeupwiththeslogan.四个小时绣上去真是值了Fourhourstoembroiderthem.-Timewellspent.沙拉太烂了看我说出来了Saladsucks.There.Isaidit.感觉好点了-是Feel
8、better?-Yep.我在想啊vebeendoingsomethinking.我不准备邀请Ann同居了mnotgoingtoaskAnntomoveinwithme.为啥出啥事了不我要求婚Why?Issomethingwrong?-No.mgoingtoaskhertomarryme.我爱她我也想要个伴侣-马背Iloveher.AndIwantapartner.-Horseback.你应该在马背上求婚-什么Youshouldaskheronhorseback.-What?不你该在热气球里求婚No,youshouldaskherinahotairballoon.不她该在热气球里你该在马背上No
9、.Sheshouldbeonthehotairballoon,andyoushouldrideuponhorseback.哦等等她在热气球里你在马背上Oh.Wait.Shesintheballoon,yourideuponhorseback,你指向天空上面飞机写字”和我结婚吧Annyoupointtothesky,upthere,skywriting,Marryme,Ann.”我觉得我能想到问她的合适方式IthinkIcanfigureouttherightwaytoaskher.求婚的方式非常重要Howyouasksomeonetomarryyouisaverybigdeal.我是说他们会在
10、余生一直重复这个故事Imean,theyhavetorepeatthatstoryfortherestoftheirlives.所以你觉得我该这么做了So,youthinkIshoulddoit,though.是是是是是Yeah,yeah,yeah,yeah,yeah.当然你能搞到5只鹰吗不10只Definitely.Canyougetfiveeagles?No,getteneagles.1.eslie-不你说得对是你的生活1.eslie.-No,youreright.Itsyourlife.想搞几只就搞几只Getasmanyeaglesasyouwant.所以Tom你今晚来对吧So,Tom,
11、youreinfortonight,right?我忘了告诉你我今晚募捐来不了了Iforgottotellyou.Icantmakeittothetelethontonight,因为我毫无兴趣becauseIhavenointerestinbeingthere.好吧你负责接待募捐的VIP特别嘉宾Okay.YoureinchargeoftheVIPspecialtelethonguest你不敢相信我请到了谁YourenevergoingtobelievewhoIgot.人们会抓狂的Peoplearegoingtofreakout.蕾哈娜-不Rihanna.-No.Dr.Oz-不是Dr.0z.-No
12、pe.医生健康节目主持人你没办法猜到的-JUStinBieberYourenevergoingtoguess.-JustinBieber.不原印第安纳步行者队小前锋DetlefSchrempfNo.Ex-IndianaPacerssmallforward,DetlefSchrempf那个DetlefSchrempf吗TheDetlefSchrempf?我知道所以真的很激动Iknow!So,itsreallyexciting.我需要你做他的保镖AndIneedyoutobehisbody-man.晚上7点去机场接他Pickhimupattheairportat7:00p.m.然后你知道招待他就行
13、Andthen,youknow,justentertainhim.因为他2点前都不需要去发型化妆室Becausehedoesntneedtobeinhairandmakeupuntil2:00a.m.Pawnee有线有发型化妆家吗DoesPawneeCableAccessevenhavehairandmakeup?呃他们有一根公用口红和一盒梳子Well,theyhaveacommunallipstickandaboxofcombs.下午5:32作为一个护士和你的朋友Asanurseandasyourfriend,我强烈建议你接下来24小时不要熬夜Ihighlysuggestyoudonttry
14、tostayupforthenext24hours.我完全能做到Icandefinitelydoit我已经24小时没睡了但我有个秘密武器vealreadybeenupfor24hours.ButIhaveasecretweapon.NutriYum能量棒吗LeslieNutriYumbars?Leslie.我知道我知道它们不好Iknow,Iknow.Theyreterrible.但它们能给我带来15分钟的疯狂小宇宙爆发Buttheygivemeaninsane15-minuteburst.此外我奶奶以前常说Plus,mynanausedtotellme,”死后必会长眠”Youllsleepwh
15、enyouredead.我奶奶以前说过的话都是最好的Mynana,sheusedtosaythebeststuff.”不要为琐事烦恼”Dontworkyourselfintoalather.”去它在的地方就能找到它”Lookwhereitisandyoullfindit.别把我送进养老院”Dontputmeinahome.”说真话令魔鬼蒙羞”Tellthetruthandshamethedevil.,魔鬼知你藏身何处Thedevilknowswhereyourehiding.”与魔鬼同行就会被掌舵”Ifyoutakeenoughrideswiththedevil,prettysoon,hesgoingtodrive.她真的很喜欢说魔鬼
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