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1、辛普森一家第三十五季第八集春田小学恭喜学生在全国贫血大塞上荣获第石名集♥合♥了小鼻涕虫们Hustleup,snotrockets.今天我们要训练TodayWestartaunit你们生理和心理的忍♥耐力thatwilltestyourphysicalandemotionalendurance.如果成功你们就会变成男人Itwillmakemenofyou,ifyousurvive.我说的项目正是交际舞“Ispeakofsocialdancing.要是跟女孩跳舞的话那就不得不碰她们rIfwedancewithgirls,thatmeanswellhavet
2、otouchthem.妈妈说只有愚民才戴口罩但我不管了Mymomsaysonlysheeplewearmasks,butIdontcare.虱子可不是闹着玩的真的有Cootiesarentahoax.Theyrereal.长大点成熟起来Growup.Maturity.成年仪式改变很美丽Riteofpassage.Changeisbeautiful.你们今天要学习触摸版本的德州两步舞YouwilllearnthetouchiestversionoftheTexastwo-step.就像这样1.ikeso.尽量贴在一起Getrealclose,boys!身体贴贴身体别留缝隙Bodytobody.N
3、odaylight.我们肯定会得虱子的Weregonnagetcootiesforsure.我得找个办法保护我们mgonnafindawaytoprotectus.我回来之前大家都独舞EveryonesolodancetillIgetback.没钱请不起护士忍♥忍♥病就好了教师专用士辛兀夫Perfect.快点把这些绷带贴在手上Quick,puttheseband-aidsonyourhands.这样就可以防止女生接触了Theyllblockanyandallgirlcontact.给我给我Gimme!Gimme!Gimme!我感觉不太好Oh,Idontfeelsog
4、ood.这些绷带闻起来像我的克劳德叔叔的味道Oh,theseband-aidssmelllikemyuncleClaude.成瘾者之选尼古丁贴片数师的力量皮肤可吸收的Transdermal尼古丁nic.0.tine!社会科学巴仔你这回可真是搞了个大的Well,Bart,youvereallywetthemogwaithistime.不是我的错Thiswasntmyfault.我又不知道那些绷带会把他们搞疯Ididntknowthoseband-aidswouldmakeeveryonecrazy.留校室你觉得我会相信吗Youexpectmetobelievethat?巴仔辛普森恶搞之王Bart
5、Simpson,theprankking?曾经将我的结肠镜检查直播给二年级学生的人Theboywholivestreamedmycolonoscopytothesecondgraders?拉尔夫不还帮你找到一个息肉呢吗Hey,Ralphdidfindthatpolyp.硬核留校室是良性的Itwasbenign.而你的惩罚可不良Unlikeyourpunishment.行别信我从来没人相信我放马过来吧Fine,don,tbelieveme.Nooneeverbelievesme.Doyourworst.欢迎来到顶级留校室Welcometosupermaxdetention.我罪不至此啊Yourw
6、orstwasdid.你看了那个加拿大跳舞小子的视频吗DidyouseethatvideowiththedancingCanadianboy?看了挺好Yeah.Cute.你看了那个意想不到的动物朋友”视频是Didyouseetheunlikelyanimalfriendsvideowiththe.浣熊骑着马乱跑那个真不错Raccoonandhorseridingaround.Goodforthem.是啊真有意思Mm-hmm,theylldothat.电子请帖侯默有人邀请我们参加婚礼Homer,wejustgotinvitedtoawedding.在波科诺斯inthePoconos.是旅行结婚I
7、tsadestinationwedding.我天不是吧咋了Oh,God,no.-What?让我来给你讲一讲旅行结婚1.etmeeducateyouaboutdestinationweddings.或者用我的话说强行旅游Or,asIliketocallthem,forcedvacations.首先你得横跨半个美国Youflyhalfwayacrossthecountry就为了在不是周日的时候坐在教堂里tositinaboringchurch,notonSunday.然后你要被困在一个破旅馆里整整两天Thenyourestuckinalousyhotelforawholeweekend周围是一群你
8、不认识的人withabunchofpeopleyoudontknow,或者是你认识而且特别讨厌的人oryoudoknowandyouhate.而这一切只是刚刚开始Andthatsjustthebeginning.到时候会有“迎宾酒”Firsttheresthewelcomedrinks,里面的招牌鸡尾酒”里wherethesignaturecocktailhasa.有黄瓜cucumberinit.而且这次还是在波科诺斯AndthisonesinthePoconos,超乱市场听起来像岛屿其实就是宾州whichsoundslikeislands,butitsjustPennsylvania.你还被
9、逼着去做所有预排好的活动Andyoureforcedtodoallthesepreplannedactivities,就像你太胖而用不上的拉链likeaziplineyouretoofattouse.接着他们还得拉来一辆电线斗卡车把你救下来Andtheyhavetobringinatelephonebuckettrucktogetyoudown!然后在婚后早午餐上Andattheafter-weddingbrunch,所有人都会叫你小鸟拉不上拉链everyonecallsyouJohnnyZipline.再然后他们会当着所有人面拆礼物Andtheyopenthepresentsinfronto
10、feverybody,于是大家都能从在线登记处知道你的是最便宜的sotheyallknowfromtheonlineregistryyoursisthecheapest.最后以上这些都超级贵Andit,sallsuperexpensive,所以你不得不把所有的航行里程都浪费在上面soyouhavetowastealltheairlinemilesyougot因为你的信♥用♥卡♥被诈骗犯偷走了whenyourcreditcardwasstolenbyscammers,买♥♥了价值五万美金的打印机碳粉whobought$50,0
11、00ofprintertoner!对了就是这个买♥♥碳粉攒的里程Ofcourse.Yes.Thetonermiles.我们可以用来飞去婚礼Wecanusethemtoflytothewedding.靠北我滔滔不绝这么久谀0h.butmyrant.侯默辛普森我能想到最浪漫的事HomerSimpson,Icantthinkofanythingmoreromantic就是一家人被运往魔幻布景thantransportingourselvestoamagicalsetting庆祝新的爱情tocelebrateanewlove.我们去定了Wearegoing.好了给你Ther
12、e.Done.有机实验室青蛙酱再清洁一次Cleanitagain.一点都不公平我什么都没做错Ugh!Thisisn,tfair.Ididntdoanythingwrong.我唯一的罪过就是我不想跟傻妞跳舞MyonlycrimeisIdidntwanttododancingwithsomestupidgirls!妞这是你在这里的原因吗Girls?Thatswhyyourehere?男人起来小子Beaman,boy.不要为了什么爱人苦了自己Dontfallapartoversomelassie丝绸般的秀发和让人迷失的酒窝withsilkyhairandadimpleyoucouldgetlosti
13、n正如无止境的甜蜜likeabottomlesspitOfsweetnessthat.感觉好多了Oh,thatfeelsbetter.你要不要聊聊这个姑娘So,youwanttotellmeaboutthisgirl?请入雅座Takeaseat一切都发生在苏格兰在我年轻的时候ItallhappenedinScotland,inmeyouth.有个我钟意的姑娘梅茜TherewasthisgirlthatIloved.Maisie.我以为她也爱我Ithoughtshelovedmeback.可她却碎了我的心Butshebrokemyheart.这就是为什么我来美国Thatswhy1cametoAm
14、erica,这个充斥着狂热摔跤爱好者的贫瘠之地blightedlandofbarbenheimmeringwrestlingbelievers.为了忘记让威利伤心的善变的姑娘ToforgettheficklelasswholetWilliedown.还有所有女人Andallwomen!与你同在兄弟mwithyou,brother.谁需要女孩Whoneedsgirls?现在咱们同仇敌惰Nowwererage-bonding.男人不让男人失望Mendontletmendown.这是我们的声音Thisishowweexpressemotion!囊地鼠诱饵#囊地鼠癖好#密器好基友#地板卜.蜡鸡阿克汉堡威利#追逐气氛组威利抄上独轮车Willie,getyourwheelbarrow.你绝不相信他们从医院往外扔了啥东西Youwon,tbelievewhattheythrewoutatthehospital.拖把威利威利Huh?Willie?Willie?西摩威利不见了我哪也找不着他Seymour,Williesgone.Icantfindhimanywhere.威利一直玩消失Ha.WiIliedisappearsallthetime.估计IE烂醉躺在郊区哪条臭水沟里Hesprobablydrunkinaditchontheoutskirtsoftown.右边郊区左边市
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